content, discontent

back from a lovely "weekend" in northern wisconsin, if one can describe sunday through thursday as weekend, avoiding all the "wait, why aren't you at work?" questioning. for the record, we weren't at work because our jobs are awesome.

for four days i loved everything.

it was all very informative. i visited the well known tourist spots of shawano, embarrass, and green bay, and learned all sorts of interesting things at my blogmate's childhood home. though i'd been warned about refrigerators that outnumber humans, i still got a good laugh at "the zucchini bars are in the beer fridge." i got to meet nate rohan, fallen blog hero, at a bar where beer was 75 cents (at that price, the seven dollar all you can beer special seemed a bit ambitious). i played lots of cribbage and acquired my own cribbage board, made at least two trips to wal-mart, ate a very satisfying amount of breakfast meat, and somehow over the course of the week worked up the nerve to make myself an online dating profile.

it's taken a little revision to make it a little less redneck - perhaps trying to find a mate while you're in an "oh my god i love wisconsin, farms, and cheese curds!" phase isn't the best idea, but suddenly the iron was hot and it was time to strike.

and now i'm right back to hating everything, and possibly everyone.

with the help of my blogmate i specifically wrote my blurb to sound a little mean and sarcastic hoping to repel a specific kind of earnestness, but i failed miserably. why does everyone have to be so disgustingly nice? and also boring? and also have absolutely no sense of humor?

i don't mean to be harsh - clearly it takes some guts to accept your fate and join the online dating pool, and probably takes even more guts to actually send out messages, but dear god people, keep it together.

i understand that it's fashionable for men to have feelings (and for the most part i'm all for it), but "i am looking for my soulmate" is totally uncalled for. just because you're vulnerable enough to use a dating service doesn't mean you have to put it ALL out there for everyone to see all at once. sooner or later you can tell me all about your parents' marriage and your last relationship and your love of puppies, but the rules of social engagement can't all get suspended just because it's the internet.

and can we ban the use of the words, "cuddle," "romantic," "big heart," and "teddy bear?"

"i am looking for my soulmate," has become so generic that i'm putting in the category of "my style is pottery barn." it goes without saying. also going without saying are, "i like sports," "family is important to me," and "i want a girl who doesn't play games."

so here it is:
swf iso emotionally stifled, slightly angry, sarcastic guy who is appropriately self-deprecating about reading personals ads and will tolerate my love of buffy the vampire slayer. will negotiate with social smokers. please submit avatar.