so i'm spending these few weeks at work in a department filled entirely by these weirdly-sarcastic-in-that-trying-to-be-worldly-to-disguse-their-dysfunction guys who are, well, weirdly sarcastic and dysfunctional, but also a lot smarter than me. which is fine, but i'm trying to get them to promote/hire me when my current job is finished, so i can't ignore them. i've been trying to learn what they're talking about, but it's hard to break in. in their free time they argue over whether or not the chinese revolution bears any resemblance to... hell, i don't know, i tuned out and started wondering if tonight's american idol competition would be as good as last night's was. (i don't care if it's not intellectual. the guy with the dreads is hot.) you can see i don't feel like i'm doing well breaking in on an intellectual level. so i tried sharing my frustrations about a recent conference i'd attended, in hopes they'd stop talking about china. this worked, to a point. i got two sentences in: "and i didn't understand where they were going because..." and smart-but-dysfunctional-guy number one (who also happens to be a spitter) interrupted to say "i love you. see, the real thing is..." and five minutes later was maybe still agreeing with my conference angst, but in such a way that i had NO IDEA what was going on, except that it involved a dislike of libertarians. but i'd started the conversation, so couldn't stop it. i just kept smiling and trying to hide my panic. eventually sbdg1 stops long enough to get the attention of sbdg2: "hey peter, she wants to work with us!" sbdg2 was unimpressed. i faked thinking i heard someone calling my name and left for a long lunch.
as sbdg1 says, "see, the real thing is..." see, the real thing is that i like what this group does, but this group is crazy. so which came first, the job or the crazy? if i take this job, will it turn me into a crazy? or is it just that only crazy people have wanted this job thus far?
i can't go back there. but i want the job. but i can't go back there. maybe i can learn a lot about politics? or convince them to get into american idol so i can have something to talk about?
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